Movie Night!

My fellow citizens of this great country of ours:
The United Corporations of America–
Why did those pilgrims land on Plymouth rock?

…because they needed a place to stage
the greatest pissing contest known to man!
#GoldenGate #PeeTUS #PissGate


Thaaaat’s right race fans,
great American tradition doesn’t get any. better. than. this.
This is all about freedom–


…the freedom to sit on your big fat ass all day and watch the single greatest sporting event known to man!



Competition! That’s what’s made this country so great.
Welcome to… the DEATH RACE!



Freedom’s Call

The free press is central to our democracy and– nah, I’m just kidding!
You know I’m going to talk about Trump.
Come on.

Although, I am a little hurt that he’s not here tonight.
Is this blog too tacky for the Donald? What could he possibly be doing instead?

1. Apple (aapl, -0.20%) $600,000 to $1.251 million
2. Microsoft (msft, -0.13%): $300,000 to $600,000
3. PepsiCo (pep, -0.37%) $150,000 to $350,000
4. J.P. Morgan Chase (jpm, -0.76%) : $100,000 to $251,000
5. McKesson (mck, -1.64%): $100,000 to $250,000
6. Nike (nke, -0.64%) : $100,000 to $250,000
7. Johnson and Johnson (jnj, -0.44%) : $100,000 to $250,000
8. General Electric (ge, +0.13%) : $100,000 to $250,000
9. Visa (v, +0.17%): $100,000 to $251,000
10. Gilead Sciences (gild, -0.86%) : $100,000 to $250,000
11. Celgene (celg, -1.39%) : $100,000 to $250,000
12. Phillips 66 (psx, -1.36%) : $100,000 $250,000
13. Caterpillar (cat, +0.05%) : $100,000 to $250,000
14. Alphabet (googl, -0.56%) : $100,000 to $200,000
Despite the candidate’s love of all things gold— The Donald has a relatively small holding in bullion: about $100,000 to $250,000

I don’t want to spend too much time on The Donald.
Because I think we can all agree that from the start he’s gotten the appropriate amount of coverage befitting the seriousness of his candidacy.


I hope you all are proud of yourselves. The guy wanted to give his hotel business a boost and now we are praying that America makes it through July.


Mmm mmm mmn.

Zu-Zu Out~


America will start winning again, winning like never before
– Donald Trump Inauguration